Gravity Kills
A 22-year-old Reston man was found dead yesterday after he tried to use occy straps (the stretchy little ropes with hooks on each end) to bungee jump off a 70-foot railroad trestle, police said. Fairfax County (Virginia) police said Eric A. Barcia, a fast-food worker, taped a bunch of these straps together, wrapped an end around one foot, anchored the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, jumped . . . and hit the pavement.
Warren Carmichael, a police spokesman, said investigators think Barcia was alone because his car was found nearby. "The length of the cord that he had assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground," Carmichael said. Police say the apparent cause of death was "major trauma." An autopsy is scheduled for later in the week.
Continued on next page / Top / Bottom and links Three young men in Oklahoma were enjoying the coming fourth of July holiday and wanted to apparently test fire some fireworks. Their only real problem was that their launch pad and seating arrangements were atop a several-hundred-thousand-gallon fuel distillation storage tank. Oddly enough, some fumes were ignited, producing a fireball seen for miles and miles. They were launched, no doubt, countless thousands of feet into the air and were found dead 250 yards from their respective seats. Don't ask God to prove Himself, He just might . . . A lawyer and two of his buddies were fishing on Caddo Lake in Texas. A lightening storm hit the lake and most of the fishermen immediately headed for the shore. But not our friend the lawyer. He was alone on the rear of his aluminum bass boat and his buddies were in the front. This gentleman stood up, spread his arms wide (crucifixion style) and shouted: "HERE I AM LORD, LET ME HAVE IT!" Needless to say, God delivered (well, wouldn't you?). The other two passengers on the boat survived and are said to have immediately joined the Ministry. Catch! They say those things will kill you . . . Next page / Back one / Top / Bottom Gimme a light! Witnesses later described the vision of one of the technicians reaching into his pocket, and retrieving an object that resembled a lighter. Upon operation of the lighter-like object, the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces of it up to three miles away. Nothing was found of the technicians, but the lighter was virtually untouched by the explosion. The technician that was suspected of causing the explosion had never been thought of as "bright" by his peers. Next page / Back one / Top / Bottom Unfortunately, I don't have the date on this. It is from the San Francisco Chronicle, though. 6 Egyptians Die Trying to Save Drowning Chicken - Associated Press Cairo - Six people drowned yesterday while trying to rescue a chicken
that had fallen into a well in southern Egypt. An 18-year-old farmer was the first to descend into the 60-foot
well. he drowned, apparently after an undercurrent in the water
pulled him down, police said. His sister, and two brothers, none of whom could swim well,
went in one by one to help him, but also drowned. Two elderly
farmers then came to help, but they apparently were pulled down by
the same undercurrent. Next page / Back one / Top / Bottom The bodies of the six were later pulled out of the well in the
village of Nazlat Imara, 240 miles south of Cairo. The chicken was also pulled out. It survived. Sad. Really sad, especially considering the intelligence (or lack thereof) of chickens. Another Darwin Award candidate, possibly a future entry. She's working
her way up to it: Car Smashes Wall at Animal Hospital - The Times Standard, Eureka. (9/4/98) EUREKA - A woman applying for a job at an animal hospital Thursday
made a bang-up impression on the boss. Next page / Back one / Top / Bottom Christina Sanchez, 19, came crashing through the wall of the Myrtle
Avenue Veterinary Hospital and Pet Center on Thursday morning - in her
new car. "She was parking and she went for the brake and got the clutch
instead," California Highway Patrol Officer Jim Beverly said. There were no injuries and Beverly estimated damage at several
thousand dollars. Sanchez was wearing shoes with large heels, Beverly
added. This may have made operating the car's pedals difficult. The vehicle knocked around a bench inside the clinic, but nobody
was sitting there at the time, owner and veterinarian Jeff Kelley-Day
said. Kelley-Day said the clinic is insured. He said he was relieved
nobody was hurt. At the same time the day before, the bench was full
of people. Kelley-Day said the accident wouldn't necessarily prevent from
Sanchez from getting the job. This page updated 7/17/99.
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Launched on the Fourth of July . . .
Next page / Back one / Top / Bottom
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A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. Big deal, you may say, but there's a twist here that makes him a Darwin Award candidate. It seems he and a friend were playing catch with a rattlesnake. You can guess what happened from here. The friend (a future Darwin Award candidate) was hospitalized.
Not much was given to me on this unlucky fellow, but he qualifies nonetheless. You see, there was a gentleman from Korea who was killed by his cell phone, more or less. he was doing the usual "walking and talking" when he walked into a tree and managed to somehow break his neck. Keep that in mind the next time you decide to drive and dial at the same time.
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Several years ago, a west Texas town, employees in a medium-sized warehouse noticed the smell of a gas leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the building, extinguishing all potential sources of ignition - lights, power, etc. After the building had been evacuated, two technicians from the gas company were dispatched. Upon entering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in the dark. To their frustration, none of the lights worked.
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Bottom, and links page
(Fat chance)
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